Expanding Your Four-Legged Family

So, things are going so well with your first canine companion that you have decided to add to the four-legged children in your family. Congratulations! Whether your intended adoptee is a dog or cat, here are a few pearls of wisdom to help you smooth the adjustment period.

Adding a Second Dog

If the established pet in the household is a dog, and you want to add another, make sure that you introduce the dogs to each other in a neutral area. This means outside of the house and yard that your original pet considers to be his territory. Let the dogs meet for the first time on the street several houses down from your household, or in the parking lot of the facility you are adopting from, or at a nearby beach or park. 

This rule applies whether you are adding a male or female, a full-grown dog or puppy, a big dog or a small dog.

An excellent way to introduce the dogs is to start with a “buddy walk.” You start with your established dog on her leash. Your buddy -- who can be a volunteer from the adopting organization, another member of your household, or a friend or neighbor familiar with dogs --  has the prospective adoptee on another leash. You walk side-by-side through the neighborhood, letting the dogs walk with you and get to know each other as they sniff and explore and work out their relationship. Switch dogs with your buddy a few times as you walk, so that each of you ends up walking each dog. Give each dog positive attention in the form of pats, praise, and treats. 

Do not make the mistake of forcing a lot of together time when you first bring home the new dog. Dogs are naturally sociable animals and will work out their own relationship -- just give them time. Look to give each of them equal attention, and at feeding time give them their meals in separate areas. 

Don’t be concerned if your dogs are very different sizes; most small dogs do not seem to have any idea that they are small! For example my French bulldogs, Wasabi and the Princess Fiona, will walk up to any size dog to say Hi! You will find that it doesn't matter if the dogs are big or small, they will get along once they understand that they are part of the same family.

Adding a Cat

Say you want to add another cat and you have an established dog or  cat  in the house. The newcomer, whether kitten or adult cat, will need its own safe space at the outset. A bedroom with a screen door is ideal -- it lets the new addition see and be seen, heard and smelled by the established pets while the new cat becomes accustomed to its new home. The pets can get used to each other and begin interacting safely through the screen door; if a screen door isn’t available, consider a very high baby gate or similar sturdy but see-through barrier.

Establish separate feeding areas and litter boxes for the cats and you will find that they will eventually adjust to each other. Be prepared for a long haul -- my most recent addition to my four-legged family took four months to adjust to her new home. Now, I cannot sit in one place without her demanding to sit on my lap!

Downsizing the Family

Pet adoption agencies and responsible breeders want their charges to end up in HAPPY homes. If your new family addition doesn’t adjust well to his new situation, contact the people you adopted from and ask for help. If the problem cannot be overcome, returning the animal so it can go to a different home may be the best option for everyone, although surrendering a pet you’ve come to care for is never easy.

Whether it is mother nature or a family situation that forces the subtraction of an animal companion from your home, it is harder on the two-legged family members than the four-legged. Our pets may spend a few days looking for the missing family member, but they will adjust to being part of a smaller family just fine!

Each family has ideas on how to cope with this type of loss. We humans  grieve in individual ways and we all process loss at a different rate. As parents you might not want your children to grieve. You may be tempted to race out and replace that missing pet. But adopting a new pet too soon can interfere with the bonding process, so let the children set their own time line on asking to replace the family pet.