Dad & Me @ the Pool: County Aims to Promote Father-Child Bond

Splashing, shrieking, and slipsliding the night away: This was the scene that took place yesterday at  in downtown Half Moon Bay, where the frenzied fun among young children and their fathers seemed like just another night at the pool.

Almost all of these children and their dads, though, rarely get a chance to swim at all in their hometown of Pescadero, where there is no access to a public pool. In fact, some were learning how to swim that very night.

Increasing public safety on the Coastside through teaching swimming skills was one of the goals of the event's organizer, the San Mateo County Fatherhood Collaborative, a program that is partially funded by the county to promote and reinforce the relationship between fathers and their children. The second goal of the night's event (titled "Dad & Me @ the Pool") was to provide an opportunity for fathers to spend time with their children as a means to develop and reinforce a strong father-child bond. The organization also sponsored a second "Dad & Me @ the Pool" event later in the evening at La Petite Baleen's San Bruno location.

"The whole purpose is to have dads be more involved and remove any perception that dads shouldn't be involved with their families," said Patrick Ledesma, Collaborative board member and county employee, who attended the event along with fellow board member Jeanine Asche. Ledesma said that the perception of this issue was not one tied to class or income, but rather one that applied to society in general.

"From the county's perspective," Ledesma said, "it reduces the need for services because the kids have another role model and another person that supports the family...so the kids have a greater chance of success."

"Dad & Me @ the Pool" is just one event which is part of an entire "Dad and Me" series the Collaborative sponsors around the county. "Dad and Me at the Park" at Coyote Point Park was popular, said Ledesma. This past year, he said, over 30 organizations, county departments, and companies took advantage of the gathering to set up a booth to do outreach and inform attendees about available services and resources.

"Dad and Me Respectfully," where children and their fathers learned how to ballroom dance and took lessons in dining table etiquette, was also a big hit, according to Ledesma.    

But the most popular "Dad and Me" event by far, Ledesma said, has been "Dad and Me at the Library," where the Collaborative has brought a traveling puppet show to each of the county's libraries in the past year -- some more than once.

"We had about 22 of those events last year, and there's about 100-150 kids and their families that show up each time," Ledesma said. "At those events, there's a ratio of 1:1 adult men to women, which you never see at the library," he said.

Years ago, Ledesma said, the Fatherhood Collaborative received funding for their staff and programs through contributions from several county departments. In exchange for contributions, each donor was allowed to have one representative on the Collaborative's board to give input, as well as monitor, the way funds were spent.

According to Ledesma, several departments started to withdraw their funding from the Collaborative due to the turndown of the economy a few years ago. As a result, he said, the county decided to limit their funding to just the one staff person that  directs the Collaborative. Money to put on programs like "Dad & Me @ the Pool" must come either from external fundraising or through in-kind donations such as the free use of the pool given by La Petite Baleen, Ledesma said, along with the in-kind donation for the bus from local nonprofit organization Puente that provided transportation to the event.

"The whole program costs the county under $50,000 a year to run," Ledesma said.

Victor Lopez was one of the dads who attended the event with his 5-year-old and 9-year-old. "My wife works for Puente," he said, "so I came to enjoy and share time with my kids."

But Lopez was also practical. "It's important for the kids to know how to swim because you never know what's going to happen," he said. "There could be a tsunami on the coast."

La Petite Baleen swim instructor Sabrina Stefko said that four children who had never swam before started swimming that very night -- the youngest in the group at 9 months of age.

"The dads were great," said Nikki Wagner, also an instructor at La Petite Baleen who was in the pool that night. "They started mimicking what we were doing with the kids and then they took over," she said.

Stefko and Wagner also taught swimming safety skills, and lifeguard Kevin Anazlone was there in case anyone needed emergency assistance in the water.

Jesus Antiono, 11 years old and a 6th grader at LaHonda Elementary, said he already knew how to swim, but attended the event with his dad because there is nowhere to swim in Pescadero.

"My favorite part was the slide," he said, smiling. "I slid down it about four times."