How to be a Parent in the Age of New Media: Workshop at Cunha School

A group of nearly 50 parents and community members gathered last night at ’s library to hear a speaker from Common Sense Media of San Francisco address the impact of social media and mobile technology on children today.  

The topic, which has sparked discussions at school districts and communities across the nation, was selected by Cunha's Parent Teachers Association (PTA), according to PTA President Doug Pomeroy, as part of its ongoing lecture series.  Both English- and Spanish-speaking parents were in attendance, along with school administrators, including Supertintendent Robert Gaskill, Cunha Intermediate Principal Michael Andrews and Cunha Vice Principal Mike Williams.

The presentation began with an introduction by Vice Principal Mike Williams. “I’ve been dealing with this quite a bit this year," he said, referring to social media and mobile technology. "It’s changing the way the world works.”

Merve Lapus, Education Program Manager for Common Sense Media, discussed the issues associated with gaming, the Internet, mobile phones, and television. In his presentation, Lapus showed samples of what our children may be seeing when they turn on the television or computer, including violent video games, sexual content in television, and questionable materials on YouTube. 

“There is a fine line between how kids use technology and how it translates between an opportunity and a challenge,” said Lapus. “Facebook and YouTube are so prevalent, but they are only a few years old.”

“Even though we don’t understand it, we can still be parents,” he said.

Audience members were asked to guess the statistical answers to questions shown on the presentation screen. 

Question: How many hours per day does the average American child between age 8-18 spend on using media and technology? 

Answer: more than 7.5 hours. 

Question: On average, how many total text messages does an American teen between 13-17 send per month? 

Answer:  3,501 messages sent and received. 

According to Common Sense Media, M-rated (Mature) video games can be downloaded without restrictions, kids can actually use text messages to cheat on school exams, and 97% of middle schoolers have been cyberbullied, with only 10% telling their parents about it.

“It’s better to be more aware,” said audience participant Jennifer Islander, a resident of Moss Beach.  Islander has four children between kindergarten and ninth grade.  “I feel good about how much I limit.  I am more worried when they go to other houses, not so much my house,” she said.

Manu Hipkins of Moss Beach has three children.  A member of the local TalkListen movement, she attended the workshop to educate herself and be part of a larger community concerned about these issues. “We all need to work together and network,” she said. 

Texting, sexting (sending a nude photo of yourself via cell phone), downloading mature videos, and gaming violence are just a few examples of activities that youth can engage in nowdays using new media and technology.

While the possibilities can seem overwhelming to parents, are there any good news?  Yes, says Lapus.  Using new media, children can open up their worlds and connect socially or view places or subjects that they might not ever know. 

“Kids are actively making videos, blogging, creating websites, connecting and collaborating on projects,” Lapus said. 

When asked by an audience member what his biggest issues at Cunha are, Vice Principal Williams replied “Facebook and Facebook.” 

Lapus demonstrated how to set up privacy settings for Facebook, going into screens that enable one to diminish who sees a child’s profile or how to turn off applications and tracking. 

“Facebook is the third largest country, next to China and India,” said Lapus, reiterating that it is important for parents to be involved in what their child is doing online.

Lapus said parents and children should be aware of the digital footprint they are leaving in cyberspace -- one that can potentially last forever.  “Parents should help children build a positive footprint,” he said. 

“It is up-to-date and well balanced information for what’s available to kids," said Andrews.  Without guidance, there are some dangers.” 

Andrews says the information gained will play a part in sixth-grader orientations at Cunha and other areas of the school as needed.

In closing, Common Sense Media’s “Rules of the Road” for parents suggest taking time to gain a better understanding of a child’s world, encouraging a balanced use of time between technology and other activities, monitoring the media your child uses, and choosing appropriate media for their age.

Lapus ended the evening by telling the audience that technology is here to stay and not to be afraid of it. “It’s most important to take time to understand more and have discussions,” he said.

Common Sense Media is a non-profit organization.  To read about their services, visit their website, their page on Facebook, or follow them on Twitter at twitter.com/commonsensenews.